Tests

I just finished my first round of tests for the semester. On the night before my first physics test, I felt I was not able to do the problems and could not think. I called a good friend in tears asking what was wrong with me, am I crazy?, etc..... Guess what? The test was just fine, I answered and thought through all the questions with time to spare...
The next day, I was unexpectedly offered a job interview for a prestigious charitable trust.... and my interviewer asked "How serious are you about medical school?"
This was much more difficult than the physics test, but the reasoning remained the same. First, I had to break everything down into its positive and negative components, calculating for the slight differences in angle. I am not pursuing medical school for salary and prestige... those can be attained in much less difficult ways. I am doing this because I feel a calling. I know that if I do not do it, I will always be in regret. I do this because medicine offers a unique chance to share in human suffering, to be on the ground with the least respected of humanity and to have a tool in my hands to help. I am doing this because I value the substance of gaining knowledge and skills much more than the shiny suit or business plan that could be used to gloss them over. I guess I really am choosing arete- to fulfill my fullest potential, to endure hardship and difficulty... The real reason is that, this choice is all that will undo that knot deep down in my stomach and let me go to sleep.